Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)
Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007) — This movie just about is the unwatchable piece of dogshit it’s made out to be. Alien Vs. Predator was a flawed and mediocre movie but every flaw it had seems to have been overcorrected here in the opposite direction to the point where it sucks even worse. In Alien Vs. Predator there was no reason to care about the characters. SO this movie gives you detailed subplots about the character except they’re stupid and lazy and make you, instead of being bored with them, actively hate them and want them to die (which, to the film’s credit, most of them do). About the only thing the film has going for it is the over-the-top gore which is sort of B-movie cool. If you can even see it. This film is badly lit to an appallingly excessive degree. I get that it’s night and but you can barely see half the shit that happens in this movie. The cinematographer was Daniel C. Pearl who did the recent remakes of Friday the 13th and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which (say what you will about their artistic merits) were at least well-photographed. The story is set in a small town in Colorado. Now small towns have worked for a variety of horror films from The Blob to Slither, but Aliens and Predators in Colorado? It minimizes the scale of two science fiction franchises that always aimed for the epic (not always successfully, mind you, but still). This movie is total crap.