Pain & Gain (2013)

Pain & Gain (2013) – I would just like to point out, before venturing into any sort of valid critique, that this is the only movie about which one can say and be grammatically correct “from the director of and starring The Rock.” Had to get that out of the way… Let us consider the … Continue reading

Originals Vs. Remakes: Slasher Edition

This article was originally published on 2 April 2010. So I had a vague awareness of the Nightmare on Elm Street series as a small child. I would walk with great trepidation through the horror isle of the video store knowing that here were things not for young’ns like myself. I knew that there … Continue reading

The Avengers (2012)

The Avengers (2012) – Many many decades ago, Timely Comics decided to take its two most popular comic characters, the Human Torch (the original 1930s robot one, not the Fantastic Four’s Johnny Storm) and Namor the Sub-Mariner, and have them fight each other. Timely (eventually renamed Marvel Comics) really ran with this idea and soon … Continue reading

The Rock (1996)

The Rock (1996) — Maybe it’s because I saw it when I was 11 and have always reverted to that mindset, but I fucking love this movie. It hits every note that an action movie should hit. [Plus it has conspiracy theories, which I was really into as a kid]. Beyond the stars (Nic Cage, … Continue reading

Hot Fuzz (2007)

Hot Fuzz (2007) — Fucking love this movie.  A Brit parody that doesn’t condescendingly mock so much as adoringly worship American cop action movies.  Who would have thought that the day would come when the Shaun of the Dead guys would give us a renewed appreciation for the trashy brilliance of Michael Bay’s Bad Boys … Continue reading

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) — Ok firstly, I [kind of] liked it.  Now I’m going to talk about my problems with it.  Minor spoilers but if the plot is what you were looking forward to about this movie, you will be disappointed. First what the fuck was the deal with the Autobot versions … Continue reading

Transformers (2007)

Transformers (2007) — I saw this in theaters a couple years ago and I must have been in a bad mood or something because I didn’t like it much.  I liked the robots fighting but the rest just left me cold.  I saw a good chunk of it on HBO a few months ago and … Continue reading